narcissistic pleasure

xmas day

Sunday, December 25, 2005

It isn't so much the way things are going, as much as the way things are supposed to happen. I'd like to find a bit of them in me, and I'd like to find a bit of my old self in me.

I used to know this person, someone down-to-earth, someone nice and friendly. I say 'used to' cos I don't know this person no more. I'd like to call this person back and say Hi how's you? but i can't cos this person....let's just say isn't around anymore. And it ain't that easy.

This year is the first in 8 years that I didn't snail mail any christmas cards out. And i don't feel the christmas spirit; maybe it's cos I'm busy, maybe it's cos there's just too much on my mind. If noone had asked me wad my christmas day plans were, it would just come and go and I'd forgot it altogether. Is it too late to send cards to just the few people? hmm. Ohwells, as zq said last year, there's 15 days of christmas so technically it wouldn't be considered late.

Everyone wants a little warmth this christmas, but what everyone wants, not everyone gets. I want a lil house in a lil corner of the world, with lil bunnies hopping ard and lil cows mooing away, with only a lil laptop to keep me in touch with the rest of the world. But I won't be getting what i want anytime soon, would I? so.

Alright, I should stop being such a downer on such a wonderful holiday. Merry Christmas to one and all.

she uttered nonsense at 1:25 AM