to be happy
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
stopitstopitstopityuqinstopit. whycan'tujuststopthinkingsomuch. allwasfinewaduweredeliriouslyecstaticthepastdayswhycan'tujustremainso. wadhappenedtournewyearsresolutions. wadhappenedtomakingothershappy. wadhappentomakingyourselfhappy. wadhappenedtopromisingothersthatu'llstopbeingsoirritating. sigh. wadsupwithmeman.
Today was bai nian-ing relatives at my mum's side. So many little kids running about around me; I just sat there looking at them, playing catching, gaming on their handheld nintendos, engaging in mindless banter. It felt so surreal. I felt old.
Maybe I drained all my energy the past few days since fri, I don't feel hyper anymore. In fact I feel ---i dunno. I feel very weary all of a sudden. More visiting to do tmr, and a mahjong session to followup, I must try to keep my spirits back up. Smileys all ard, please :)
she uttered nonsense at 12:57 AM
i hate thinking of titles
Friday, January 27, 2006
Aiyahhh allyne, I'm lazy to update larr.. and I don't wanna bore people out reading about what's going on in my life. Which, if you really do want to know, is co co co and more co.
Having said that, I'm starting to get used to the pace of this busy schedule, rushing from one tut room to another, from sch to nyh... Reaching back to hostel at 11 or so, bathing at 12 and risk becoming like someone *coughNAIMAcough*... staying up to the wee hours of the morning doing stuff for co or rushing out tuts. Repeat.
So have I bore you enough yet?
Went jogging with xiu ydy, manzz... It's been a while since I jogged and today my leg muscles hurt like nobody's business... And my stomach muscles are so sore from doing supposed-to-be-50-situps. Note the supposed, cos I think I only did like 40. hahahah
Everyone please cross your fingers for me, if nothing goes wrong, I will only need to be back one day next week!! :) Don't jealous horr. hehheh.
Gosh, jinx has gone mad. I'd better sleep before she starts nagging more nonsense. I DO NOT WASTE MY LIFE AWAY MSNING!!!! Off I go now, tomorrow's a long day.
she uttered nonsense at 1:33 AM
yayyy!
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Whooooooooo shopping is therapeutic!! Just being in town and breathing town air, I feel so much better alr. Add to that a new bag, a new top, and new shoes, and I'm a recharged person. woot!! Although i still can't beat jk's shopaholic-ness. My goodness. hahhahah
I want the fcuk skirt. But it's freaking 200 bucks. haizz.
Ahpek just added everyone into a conversation accidentally. How silly, how blur, and so very ahpek. hahahahhahhaha so luan.
Happy bdae to our dearest jw, glad that our surprise was pretty successful. Well if u compare with last year's. hahaha. I guess it's true that when one is down, surprises often work quite well. So jk, no surprises for u this yr aite? You're too happy alr. hahahahhahah
Went for the mini 4g class gathering at jn's hse...and everybody din gif me face. So many pple left before i arrived. tot i'd go there to show my face and listen to gossips. but no gossips. sheesh. hahah although it's partly my fault tt i reached so late too. oops. hahah and i think jn's getting too white.... like bai zhan ji. hehheh she'd better not see this if not she'll dotz me again. hahahah
I just realized this entry is pretty illogical and super random. But can't you just feel my happiness radiating from this entry? It's so full of cheerfulness that I won't be surprised if there's pple hating me rite now for being so happy. Too happy le. But you know what? I can't help it, cos I'm at home!! I love my home, don't you? wooooooooooT!~
she uttered nonsense at 1:44 AM
update
Friday, January 20, 2006
Upcoming concert's making everyone so tensed, so stressed up, so easily irritable. I don't even dare to crap much anymore, in case I accidentally step on anyone's toes. I'd just like to say that isnt the purpose of holding this for everyone to have fun and to bring enjoyment to others? Of course we do have certain expectations to meet, certain goals to surpass, but if all these ever does is to make everyone so pissed off, then why bother holding right? I'm not trying to act oh-so-philosophical here, all I want to do is to tell pple to not take things too seriously, you know, that you can actually accomplish tasks without finding fault with everyone and the world. And maybe even have fun at doing it.
And don't get me wrong and think that I don't care about this at all. I do. I may seem as though I'm so happy all the time, but I do worry about my own task too. Just because I don't sulk and get angry all the time doesn't mean that I don't care or that I'm not doing anything. Every night, or morning, before I go to sleep, I mentally tick off the things which I have to do the next day. I just choose not to announce to everyone the things I'm doing, things which are ongoing, things which are pending, things which are simply stuck at the back of my head. Because I know that I'm not the only one who is busy; others are too, and the only thing I can do is to grin and bear it. And also try to enjoy doing it. You know what they say about simple pleasures, these days, the only form of relaxation I get, is the silly night time self-entertainment and self-deprecating humour that me and jinx engage in. And it helps; it's the only time of the day when I can finally go weak with laughter and just be myself without worrying if others think we're slacking off our work.
In this time when, as jk said, CO is our major and accounting becomes our minor, my roomie is the only thing keeping me sane. I love my roomie much much. But don't tell her k? Her ego is humongous enough already. :)
she uttered nonsense at 3:10 AM
busy busy
Saturday, January 14, 2006
Whew finally have time for a breather. Been so busy these days, my head is bursting with things to be completed. Like I told jinx, I want a pensieve so I can keep all my thoughts in check and sort things out one by one.
I think I hai-ed myself by squeezing so many lessons on mon and tue...have no idea how I'm gg to survive this sem. 6 hrs of lessons on monday, 7 bloody straight hours of lectures on tues...and co on both nights. I think I may just die midway through the sem. Lots and lots of flowers during my funeral will be nice, thank you very much.
Wed was unbearable..maybe it's cos I din sleep a wink the night before, or I didn't noe of the makeup lectureS till the day itself, or cos we noe wad's gg to happen to us...felt like throwing up that night. Seriously. And my dearest jinx had to keep making me laugh when I was ready to cry and puke out. hahahaha.
Went home for less than 12 hours, and was back agn today. How sad. Wad to do, I guess just haf to get used to it lorr. I've got no life, CO is my life. Or, to be optimistic, as wc said, I've got a life, CO is my life. Either way, siann. hahahhahaha
So tired, but gtg back nyh now. boooo shall be back for er zuo ju.
she uttered nonsense at 4:05 PM
sesame street!!
Friday, January 06, 2006
I feel sandwiched between them both. Not that I don't want to be, I just don't like the feeling. I don't even know who to help now.
Anyone out there who's a sesame street fan too? I'm looking for all their songs...not the nowadays one which has the hiphop feel which I don't really like. I still prefer their old soothing childrenish songs. haha so does anyone know where i can buy a collection of these?
I just got 'long-story'-ed again. That phrase is sooooooooo overused.
erm. Ok I actually had lots to say but I forgot. There goes. I think my memory is poor. Ok, I don't think, I know it. That explains my leaving stuff here, there and everywhere these days. hahah old already okaY!! Shall blog another time den.
Anyone wants to go back sn next week? I'm dreaming of bowls, especially those which come in orange.And all i want to be, is just a friend.
she uttered nonsense at 1:52 AM
HAPPY new year
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Please don't do this to me,
please. Left right up down, I'm surrounded by pple who are on the verge of depression. And I'm getting affected. Just when I decided to get over my own self pitying. I thought 'New year' is supposed to come with a 'Happy' in front.
I now sorta understand how --- felt that time. It's not just the feeling of helplessness, it's the feeling of doing all you can yet knowing it's not helping at all. It's like, 'C'mon, I need your help here alrite?' Dare I even say it, I could feel the anger starting to bubble.
Note to self: Never, NEVER listen to jay's songs when upset. Especially not the ballads.
she uttered nonsense at 2:17 AM
