Wednesday, November 30, 2011
How many times and in how many ways can you say to someone this isnt working
now what did i get myself into.......
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 6:59 PM
Friday, February 25, 2011
I want this so much I can taste it.
And because I want this SO MUCH, I'm so afraid if it falls through.
It's been a long time since I bothered to fight, bothered to act, for something that I want.
It's refreshing.
Labels: discovering meself, life
she uttered nonsense at 1:03 AM
Monday, January 03, 2011
It's only been 3 days (or less?) and I feel like my old self back again.
(:
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 12:14 AM
Saturday, January 01, 2011
I'm not going to lie and say it wasn't without apprehension. But I AM glad I'm out of there. There's so much to say, and so much to reminisce about, and I guess it all boils down to the people. Thank you all, for everything, for all the wonderful, and not-so-wonderful memories. I'll miss yall!
And with that, it's also with a mixture of excitement and slight trepidation that I'm gonna embrace the coming year. New year, new start, new beginnings. And for this year I'm going to live with the one motto that I've resolved to embody, that you only live once. Gonna go do things that I've always wanted to do, while I'm still able, before I regret it. It's better to do it and regret it, than to regret not doing it at all.
So friends, I might just totally make a fool out of myself this coming year, or I might get lucky and finally know, and get, what I want. Regardless of the former or the latter, pls stand by me and wish me the best of luck! I need all the luck and well-wishes I can get now. Cross fingers!
Happy holidays everyone, and may 2011 be the highlight of your life. I'll keep all of you in my prayers! Love. (:
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 11:50 PM
Sunday, October 03, 2010
Just because I have it bad doesn't mean that I have to be a self-righteous arse about it. Others made a smarter choice while I was stupid, so I have no right, and can only live with the choice I made.
Need to keep telling myself that.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 10:19 PM
Thursday, July 22, 2010
>half a yr into 2010. What have we accomplished? Honestly?
I used to be passionate; I used to have a life; I used to write, used to sing, used to read, used to play, used to enjoy.
I used to breathe.
and then I came ey and I died
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 1:21 AM
Sunday, March 07, 2010
Major grouse.
Why is it when opportunity comes knocking, EVERYTHING happens at the same time? And when all is said and done, when the dust has cleared, you realize, hey I'm back to square one. Opportunity my arse.
No longer wanna complain about work cos, you know, I'm sure everyone is sick and tired of my complaints and then it all boils down to why don't you just fking quit which will just end up with idunnowhyi'mstillherebutiamsoshuddup.
Stupid is as stupid does. Stupid - the one word I've been using recently to describe myself, and to answer all questions that are thrown my way.
And years after, still at status quo, still lost, still no meaning.
Friends with the world, partner to none.
Still hidden inside the society-mould that been longing to break.
Society-mould? Or Selfmade-shell.
Labels: discovering meself, whatswrongwithme
she uttered nonsense at 11:14 PM
Sunday, December 20, 2009
If seeing me in my most chui state or seeing that I'm not doing as well as you somehow think that I am will make you feel better about yourself, or about things in relation to yourself....
... go ahead.
Need to gain more good karma (again), and more importantly, get down to setting certain goals for myself and taking back control of my life. Spiralling out of hand - something needs to be done. New year new resolutions!
Keeping fingers crossed.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 12:31 AM
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
omg i'm so d it's insane i feel like a stalker HAHAHAHHAA
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 9:44 AM
Sunday, October 04, 2009
It's always hard to say sorry.
Sorry.
---
Laughter. Pure happiness and unadulterated joy?
Or a facade to cover up embarassment.
Not always as hardy as one seems.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 5:58 PM
Friday, September 18, 2009
I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down
I know,
I've got to let it go, and just enjoy the show
Why I'm still here? Jinx hit the nail on the head - it's about the fear of change.
Change - the only constant. Cliche.
Give me the courage.
cos Life is a maze, and Love is a riddle
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 12:42 AM
Monday, June 22, 2009
There's something very wrong with me... I get very happy and excited when listening to the pokemon theme song
Pokemon- TV Theme So.mp3 -
Labels: discovering meself, music
she uttered nonsense at 1:46 PM
Monday, June 15, 2009
Everyone's a little bit unsatisfied,
Everyone goes 'round a little empty inside
Need to get over myself; need to come to terms with the status quo.
Do I, really? What about finding the courage and the determination.
When I think about it, I'm pretty lucky actually. There isn't very much that I need to worry about that isn't within my control or that I really can't change. Well perhaps except that but I guess things have been improving (I hope) and I should just be thankful that it is so.
Actually.... why should I? Why should one be satisfied if being unsatisfied motivates? It's unsatisfied, not ungrateful. I'm grateful, very very grateful. Very thankful, very appreciative. But uncontented. Is that even possible? But if being unsatisfied conjures new aims, new goals, new hopes. .. dreams. Can come true, can't they? Maybe it IS about finding courage, and the will power.
I feel like Kate Monster. What will my conclusion be?
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 12:20 AM
Sunday, December 07, 2008
Everybody's so grown up now.
And that makes me wanna not grow up even more, eeks.
I want to watch cartoons, take afternoon naps, be childish, chase butterflies and dance in the rain,
even if it's just for a week.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 1:39 AM
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
I have about had it with people emoing me. Seriously. I'm afraid I will really lose control of myself and say or do things that I will regret if this continues on. If you're unhappy with me about something, please, just say it so that I can change for the better (if it's valid in the first place hurr!), or at least I will know what to do and what not to do to you in future.
I am going to stfu in front of you from now on, to prevent any further misunderstandings.
I just don't get some people. I've said many times before, I don't usually take myself very seriously. I love to joke, I love to self-deprecate, I love to play with words - don't take everything I say literally and simply at its face value. That's why it's called listening, not hearing.
I need to remind myself that some people just don't have a sense of humour, or at least not my type of humour. And that some people just can't take a joke, even if the joke is totally on me and not on them.
Labels: discovering meself, rantings
she uttered nonsense at 10:07 PM
Saturday, April 12, 2008
I've always prided myself at being good at my languages (ok, language. singular. english.) and that's why I clearly remember that one time where some tutor commented that You need to brush up on your vocab or sth to that extent. Ever since then I've somehow doubted my language ability, but today! Today is the glorious day that I no longer do because It's a pleasure to read your essay. You write well.
Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet.
Honestly I think my last-min works are always my best works. HAHA
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 3:30 PM
Monday, February 18, 2008
I am hopeless.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 1:13 AM
Monday, December 10, 2007
It isn't about the value of the presents, nor the number of gifts itself; it never was. It's the company, the thought and sincerity, and the love from them.
Birthday lunch at marmalade pantry with the LOTS, and then dinner with the family. A surprise longD call from junyen in china, I couldnt even guess who it was, I really didn't expect it! Plus a couple other calls from people who care -
more than enough to remind me what a lucky girl I am.
Thank you, you guys.
Now, hopefully, as a belated present, to wait for that call from ey with fingers crossed, and everything will be perfect. At least, close to. hehh.
I've learnt quite alot these few days, about assumptions, about differing expectations, about family, about friendships. I've probably had a glimpse of what really is, truth in its most pure and uncovered form. It hasn't been a pleasant journey, it's been shocking, it's been bitter. Sometimes just when you think that you're ready to hear the truth, you realize the truth hurts so much that you'd rather not know. But I believe I've learnt from it all, and I AM ready to handle the truth, because you know why?
I'm 21. (:
Labels: discovering meself, life
she uttered nonsense at 12:17 AM
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Maybe...
Maybe I'm really just a superficial person.
Today, I ate humble pie. A huge slice of it.
It's not a good feeling, but it's better than the possible alternative I guess.
It's not what I want either... but I can't seem to find the strength or energy to turn it otherwise.
And I think I've become too apathetic for my own good...
This is bad, very bad.
Labels: discovering meself
she uttered nonsense at 10:25 PM
Monday, May 28, 2007
): Monday again. Why do the weekends go by so fastttttttt?!
Keety says her 'monday blues' start on sunday nights, hurhurr. But this week will be more manageable I guess, since there's a break in between, and my fingers are still crossed for fri.
There's just so much I want to do.
Always wondered what it would be like if this and that hadn't happened. Conforming to the status quo, sticking to what you're comfortable with. Maybe not so much here, but there's a certain degree. Why can't a cheerleader-type person love studying too? Why can't a geek love partying once in awhile? Why are there boundaries in the first place, and where do you belong to? But OB taught that stereotypes are used for convenience, for one to form an opinion of the other in a quick glance.
Methinks there's a side of everyone that everyone hides. Maybe to conceal one's inhibitions and weaknesses, I guess.
And I have no idea where I'm going now.
Forgive me, I've got tons of random thoughts running through my head at this moment, can't think straight. Too many things to ponder over. Everything inside is very mashed up, not exactly emo, not exactly happy, not exactly nostalgic, not exactly pissed, not exactly lonely. At the crossroads. Confusion, uncertainty - ah, that is it.
I want to try breaking out of my comfort zone.
Labels: discovering meself, random
she uttered nonsense at 12:08 AM
